June 9, 2023

RPG Horror Story Speed Run! w/ Mike Cortese [RPG Horror Story]

RPG Horror Story Speed Run! w/ Mike Cortese [RPG Horror Story]

[#113] Our final special LIVE episode recorded in the spacious gaming area of The Keep in Brick, NJ. This week, Jason, Josey, and Jim welcome another local NJ gamer, Mike Cortese, who brings us an epic horror story that stops at all the Bad Game...

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[#113] Our final special LIVE episode recorded in the spacious gaming area of The Keep in Brick, NJ. This week, Jason, Josey, and Jim welcome another local NJ gamer, Mike Cortese, who brings us an epic horror story that stops at all the Bad Game Stations of the Cross. Everything we love can be found at curmudgeonsanddragons.com

Hosted by Jason Portizo, Josey Diaz, and Jim Crocker
Produced and Edited by Jason Portizo

Curmudgeons and Dragons is a JTP Audio production
WEBVTT

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Sometimes talking with friends feels like role
playing. Sometimes it feels like combat.

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Join us at the round table and
roll an ishato. This is Curmudgeons and

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00:00:12.720 --> 00:00:27.719
Dragons. Hello adventurers, Welcome to
Courmudgeons and Dragons. I'm Jason Fortiso.

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I enjoyed live by Jim Crocker.
This episode of Commugison Dragons Live is the

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00:00:34.679 --> 00:00:38.439
last day he gets to use that. Joe, it only took me five

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episodes to train you to do that, so that's good. I'm really glad

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00:00:42.280 --> 00:00:44.920
to be here. I hate being
recepted to training. Cool. Yeah,

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Josie, he has is with me, huh by with us? I mean

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she's very far away in England,
but coming to us live over riverside here

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in the ways that matter. Any
spirit with spirit? And did you imagine

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if I could just haunt you at
this level all the time, you Paris,

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if you taught me all the time, but not to this extent.

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Story today, somebody from our guests, Mike Cortiz, Mike, how you

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doing doing pretty good? How we
all doing? I'm listening with this our

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fifth episode we're recording in a row. We're doing fantastic, living the fucking

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dream, My guy living something we
love having guests live in the dream surviving

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the nightmare. Yeah yeah, so
here you go. I guess that is

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one of our favorite things. So
that's great. This is this is usually

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not like a guest having type of
show, but to have so many this

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month has been great. So thank
you so much for joining us, and

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thanks for us submitting what it seems
to be a completely batshit story that I

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cannot wait to get into. I'm
so ready. So Mike, real quick.

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I met you through the one of
the Facebook groups I believe I met

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you through New Jersey D and D
players. Um ye, seems to be

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a pretty good in active group.
So any other any of the localists want

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to join that? Which is all
I was wondering why we were getting so

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many people from New Jersey. Was
all right, because that was the responded

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to me way way back in the
day. Jason posted a message to that

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group saying, hey, we're losing
someone from our podcast. Anybody might be

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interested in That was how the show
yet from a group? Yeah? Also

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how I found that about the Keep, which is where we're recording from right

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now. This is Go through the
keephobby dot com and support my friendly local

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game store because they are supporting us
by giving us space to record today.

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So thank you to our friends of
the Keep. And you go back and

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listen to the first two episodes this
month where we had Tony and the owner

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not only giving his story but giving
his well, you know, his his

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DND story and then his story,
yeah, about owning stores and stuff like

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that. Really cool episode, so
make sure you go check those out.

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But today we've got Mike with us. Um. So I you sent me,

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but kind of like the TLDR,
which was still like seven paragraphs,

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um, and it just got wilder
and wilder, to the point where one

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of your other players, your friend
Andrew also DMed me to say that whatever

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story you told me, as as
wild as it is, is one hundred

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percent true. So I have to
hear the rest of this, and so

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I'm just gonna I'm gonna back off. I'm gonna let you just kind of

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take it away. So, uh, Mike, the floor is yours,

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all right? Uh? Flow is
that this was probably back in September ish

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of last year. There is a
message on the same group that you and

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I found each other on that an
individual was looking to run a five E

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homebrew campaign looking for players. So
I signed up the person that DMU Andrew

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signed up, and a few other
people signed up. Cool, we're all

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set to play a few weeks before
playing, um, you know, we

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all get together on the on the
thing we're talking and he sends out a

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seventeen page PDF on his world.
Okay, okay, I like it.

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That's dedication, but also like,
oh my god, it is dedication,

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and if it's a strange world,
hey, it could be Okay, it

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could be legit that this is going
to be interesting I've seen or heard of

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longer. So, but that is
like, that's that's not like so no.

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Um. So. The PDF included, but not limited to, certain

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rules that he was going to be
using, such as a new monetary system

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using pieces of eight rather than tens, a new calendar which had six days

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rather than seven, not even the
ten day that D and D is known

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for. Okay, a list of
weapons, all of which did the exact

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same damage with the exact same damage
type. Everything was exact and there was

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no change. It was just the
change of the names of the weapons,

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such as like pistols, using a
baretta, using a nine male, using

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different stuff, all the same damage
type, all the same firearms on top

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of that too, Yeah, firearms
and whatever else, all sorts of different

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stuff. He had a list of
the items that were purchasable in game.

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He had a list of magic items
available in the game, whereas he didn't

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even know what some of these did. Okay, um, and they were

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all available for purchase. Whenever you
got to a town, there's the magic

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store. Just had portals that you
could get stuff from and pick it out.

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Weird stuff. Okay, I'm sure
they'll end up fine, go ahead.

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Yeah. Um. So this seventeen
page pdf was just interesting reading.

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Nothing really came of that session.
Zero comes in and he just he tells

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us it's a kind of a five
E based game, but it's going to

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use mechanics from three point five Pathfighter
two E and five E. So he's

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just built a new game and was
like, come play. Yeah pretty much.

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Yes, Okay, that's exactly that's
exactly how it is. That's exactly

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how it turns. Great, go
ahead, design your design your own game.

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Love it. I'm sure Jim would
play it. So some of these

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mechanics, none of so background on
it. All of the players that came

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into this have never played three point
five or Pathfinder. We're all relatively new

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to D and D five coming from
around twenty nineteen. We all started right

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before Fair three point five and Pathfinder
the same thing, so still yeah,

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Okay, again, I'm not familiar
with that. I haven't played either one

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of those, so I don't know. Yeah. The TLDR on that is

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that Pathfinder was a response to fourth
edition and was essentially kind of a rewrite

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of three to five with a couple
of things, though maybe a little crunchier,

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and that hardcore Pathfinder players will get
cranky if you say it's just three

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point five. Yeah, yeah,
which is the most important party. So

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then I'm guessing you guys are already
familiar with a fortitude save that he wanted

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to put in place, combined with
constitution saves, like an additional saving throw

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that he would use with other that
in addition, so you had your con

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save and then you would have a
fortitude save which had a different a different

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mechanic for calculating that using your constitution
model. Yeah, because in three point

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five you would have fortitude reflex and
will saves as opposed to as opposed to

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just rolling on the stats, which
is the thing that makes the most sense.

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Yeah, right, so he wanted
to implement that as an additional saving

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thrown. Oh my god. He
also had different calculations for your AC,

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whereas he would on his armors.
He just made different armors have different modifiers.

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Then you would add ten and that's
your AC bonus. And instead of

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the traditional five E disadvantage on stealths, you would have a movement penalty if

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you weren't proficient, okay, which
did not make sense to us, as

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you're not supposed to use armors that
you're not proficient. I'm already I would

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have been out of this game,
like, I'm so sorry, I'm too

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stupid, too stupid day. So
he again in this list that he had

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it in his pdf, he had
the different armors listed. This armor has

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a plus one, this armor has
a plus two, all the way up

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to like a plus nine for your
AC. So the calculation was ten plus

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whatever the armor modifier was, that's
your base AC. And again these were

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all purchasable at a shop. The
strange things really started to take place during

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the campaign. In the throes of
the campaign, we had some interactions with

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NPCs that my character as the I
rate asshole. Yes, I was the

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problem player started calling this guy a
different name in a in a way and

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kind of made the DM turn him
into like a mafia don. Okay,

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so far, I'm in. So
eventually this mafia don became a benefactor and

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allowed us to purchase go to the
stores and purchase things at his expense,

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not hours. Okay. So basically
we got the run of the mill of

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every Magic guy and we wanted every
armor. We wanted everything within the first

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three sessions. Okay, so what
did you end up with? I was

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playing an artificer, so I ended
up with like a nineteen AC nine plus

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nine armor. Then with all the
infuse, Um, I'm sorry, what

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is the artificer thing? Yeah,
it is infusion. Ended up with like

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an AC of like twenty one,
twenty two somewhere around there. Level three.

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Yeah, yeah, that's great.
God, sorry, had he had

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rings of invisibility, We had all
sorts of stuff, and he had no

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idea where this stuff was. It's
like he had never played five he before

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or even read the DMG. Probably
didn't probably not. Um, Well,

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the DMG wouldn't help if he's building
out of three different games. Oh yeah,

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00:10:01.759 --> 00:10:05.000
tree, but it would still give
you a basis on what these magic

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items are supposed to do. God
okay, but initially we were supposed to

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have five pieces, myself um,
the one who messaged you, Andrew,

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Um, we had Bill CJ.
And then there was supposed to be Kate.

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Kate for whatever reason backed out last
minute, but due to she was

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unable to commit to playing, but
would still end up showing up every now

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and then on this on the discord
that we were playing on m HM,

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just just to hang out, just
like a lurker. We love a lurker,

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a lurker and having her camera on
still as well. Okay, I'll

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picture that happened in like an IRL
game, Like I was like, yeah,

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I can't make it tonight, and
then they just show up at your

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house and just watch you play at
the table, just watch. Yeah,

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it was. It was definitely weird
because she would come in at strange times

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and you hear the escort ding ding
and there she is, well him as

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she wouldn't mute herself either, so
whatever she's got going on in the background,

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children screaming her driving her car having
almost an upskirt view of underneath the

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steering wheel while she's driving down the
road. Very distracting, very distracting of

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this at that point, just listen
to an actual play podcast. You don't

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00:11:24.919 --> 00:11:28.799
have to You don't have to subject
people to the going abouts of your life.

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Yeah, he had, the DM
had, you know, spoken to

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us about our what our characters are, you know, the individual session zeros

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00:11:37.720 --> 00:11:41.360
along with the session zero for all
the PCs. Apparently, over the course

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00:11:41.399 --> 00:11:45.720
of his with another one of the
players, the DM decided to give one

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of the PCs a strange colored birthmark
without telling the PC what it was about

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or anything about it. Then,
when it came time for him to describe

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his character, the DM said that
there was someone with a birthmark, and

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when the PC did not respond,
that's your que dude, excuse me,

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Oh my gosh. So, by
the way, you got this birthmark.

160
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Now it's like, well, yeah, if it's a birthmark, shouldn't I

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00:12:13.240 --> 00:12:16.879
know about it? Right? Yeah? Um, let's have a birthmark and

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00:12:16.960 --> 00:12:20.000
more of the last five minutes mark, like if it's on if it's on

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your back, and you know,
with like D and D technology, you

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would never see it. You would
only have to take people's word for it

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that it was there, right,
yeah, I honestly don't remember where it

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was. I honestly I think it
may have been on his neck, like

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00:12:37.279 --> 00:12:41.879
like something like right over here,
yeah, or something I can't quite remember,

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00:12:41.159 --> 00:12:45.519
but that that's not the egregious one. The egregious one is where he

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changes a PC's race prior to a
session, just for from it, from

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a human to a damn fear.
So like mid game or before you started

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00:12:58.159 --> 00:13:03.960
playing, UM mid game? Oh
okay, did he have did he have

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an explanation or was he just hoping
you were going to roll with it?

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00:13:07.679 --> 00:13:13.480
He had an explanation for it.
But this happened to a PC who UM

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00:13:13.759 --> 00:13:18.639
was brand new to the game,
had never played before our first session,

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and missed UM all sessions in between, so that it was only their second

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ever session. What the fuck?
Okay? Apparently they did have a conversation

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about it, but the DM did
not tell this this person what it meant

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for their character, what abilities they
would have, anything about it. It's

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a major change. Just expected him
to know. I are you impressed yet,

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00:13:46.600 --> 00:13:56.840
Josie? I am. Let's see. Uh yep, strange color birthmark?

181
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Uh human to a dam fear.
I'm so glad you have a list.

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00:14:03.960 --> 00:14:07.919
I had to, I had to
do something. They would just be

183
00:14:07.960 --> 00:14:15.039
all over the place. I made
bullet points of everything that I told you.

184
00:14:15.200 --> 00:14:18.480
But there's more to it. Oh
my god. Um. For whatever

185
00:14:18.559 --> 00:14:22.120
reason, and I still don't understand
this, he wanted the cleric of the

186
00:14:22.159 --> 00:14:28.519
party to either choose religion or medicine
as their base of healing, like he

187
00:14:28.559 --> 00:14:33.639
wanted to change up the cleric class. Put his own spin on things.

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00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:37.320
Yeah, put his own spin on
things. If it ain't broke, my

189
00:14:37.440 --> 00:14:43.200
guy, Oh he broke everything.
Oh god, Okay, all right,

190
00:14:43.360 --> 00:14:46.360
things are so broken you have to
break other things that they work in this

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00:14:46.399 --> 00:14:50.399
new broken system, right, Hey, that's gotta be it. Um.

192
00:14:50.480 --> 00:14:56.200
We there was an entire session that
was a shopping day now as it was

193
00:14:56.279 --> 00:15:03.279
just RP and shopping. There was
a little bit of RP, but not

194
00:15:03.360 --> 00:15:07.279
very much, just a shopping day
list. I don't mind like five minutes

195
00:15:07.279 --> 00:15:11.080
of like trying to talk to a
ShopKeep if the shop keeps interesting. But

196
00:15:11.159 --> 00:15:13.639
this is why I hate shopping.
Yeah, man, you and I are

197
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on so much on the same page
that between sessions, well on record hating

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shopping in game. And this is
why, because it turns through a whole

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fucking day. And let me guess
most of that time was spent with them

200
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haggling and not getting anywhere. No, most of the time it was him

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looking at his notes finding out how
much everything cost. We had a bad

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shopping trip, and it wasn't the
player's fault. Yes, he had a

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00:15:37.480 --> 00:15:41.159
notebook, and he showed multiple times
on screen, you know, a notebook

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entirely that thick of all of his
notes of every shop, everything, everywhere,

205
00:15:48.480 --> 00:15:54.399
alphabetized, different menus, different things
of how much everything cost, to

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the point where when an NPC we
were going into a colosseum and he described

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that there were vendors up and down
the sides of the street. Entering the

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colisseum, saying that there were food
vendors, an NPC asked what do they

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serve? He took five minutes outside
of game to go and find specific as

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to find out what they were selling
and how much it costs to answer his

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own question, yes, my god, no, no, no, I'm

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00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:27.399
sorry, the the PC asked this, not an NPCs still ridiculous, him

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00:16:27.519 --> 00:16:30.679
still ridiculous to find out, you
know, take ten five, five,

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five or ten minutes whatever it took
for him to find these in his notes.

215
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Yeah, if you're gonna have um
a binder full of your new game

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to play, you should probably have
some tabs to make it a little easier

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for yourself, right, thinking like
five five whole minutes flipping through pages just

218
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to be like be like, oh, yeah, they have falafel today.

219
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Pretty I mean, was was it
that or was it like, well,

220
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this vendor has falafel which you can
order in three sizes. You can get

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it with or without Tazeki sauce.
You can get it with fries or without

222
00:17:06.480 --> 00:17:12.119
steak fries, your season fries.
Like was it I think granular level of

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00:17:12.200 --> 00:17:18.359
detail? That's yeah, that's so
much. He did so much work they

224
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did. He did so much work
at one point stress At what point does

225
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prep turn into mental illness? I
think is the question that we're trying.

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00:17:29.279 --> 00:17:33.960
This is the line I'll try trying
to figure out. Oh my god,

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00:17:36.799 --> 00:17:38.640
see our last episode about the importance
of keeping your mental health outs are in

228
00:17:38.720 --> 00:17:42.720
the game game. So so here's
here's Mike. Here's what I'm curious about,

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Like, there must have been something
compelling about the game that kept you

230
00:17:48.519 --> 00:17:52.039
playing through all of this or was
it just like like it hit that tipping

231
00:17:52.079 --> 00:17:56.279
point where you're like, I just
we gotta stick around just to see what

232
00:17:56.319 --> 00:18:02.440
happens next, like like sunk cost
fallacy baby yeah, or like like like

233
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watching the like like not being able
to look away from the train wreck kind

234
00:18:04.759 --> 00:18:08.039
of thing. I think it's a
little bit of not being able to walk

235
00:18:08.079 --> 00:18:12.720
away from the train wreck and find
out what There's got to be something to

236
00:18:12.759 --> 00:18:18.559
this story and the third part of
it has to lead somewhere. Fees doing

237
00:18:18.720 --> 00:18:23.200
this for the Falafel stand. Imagine
when we get to the big battle,

238
00:18:23.359 --> 00:18:29.079
but what it's going to be,
like that's it that battle will be.

239
00:18:29.920 --> 00:18:33.079
And not to mention that I was, um, I think I was just

240
00:18:33.200 --> 00:18:36.640
coming off being a d M in
a campaign and I just wanted to play

241
00:18:36.680 --> 00:18:38.839
as a as a PC for a
little while. Yeah yeah, yeah,

242
00:18:38.920 --> 00:18:45.480
and having the idea of my PC
um imbued into my head just stamps right

243
00:18:45.480 --> 00:18:48.880
in there. And I love the
character. I just wanted to continue playing

244
00:18:49.160 --> 00:18:55.359
character. Yeah yeah, yeah.
This is this is where it really starts

245
00:18:55.400 --> 00:18:59.920
to get batshit crazy with this spectator. So it's just the same spectator or

246
00:19:00.200 --> 00:19:03.759
us a new spectator, No,
the same spectator from moving Okay, So

247
00:19:03.799 --> 00:19:07.240
I mentioned that she would pop in
at strange times, you know, leave

248
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the mic on, leave the camera
on. So right after session four,

249
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the day after our fourth session,
she comes into our discord text chat and

250
00:19:19.359 --> 00:19:26.079
says that um, she and the
DM have gotten messages about foul language use

251
00:19:26.680 --> 00:19:30.599
in the discord. Now here's here's
here's a quick thing about that. We

252
00:19:30.599 --> 00:19:34.039
were not using what the hell is
it? We were on a video We

253
00:19:34.039 --> 00:19:37.599
were on a video call very similar
to what we are now. Okay.

254
00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:41.680
We were not in a we were
not in a server. We were in

255
00:19:41.799 --> 00:19:45.000
a at a video voice chet like
like like a room like a breakout,

256
00:19:45.440 --> 00:19:48.319
right, Yeah, yeah, yeah, we were. We were in a

257
00:19:48.319 --> 00:19:52.799
group DM voice video chat. Okay, yes, we were in discord.

258
00:19:53.799 --> 00:20:00.319
Um and she this person claims that
they had gotten a message about foul language,

259
00:20:00.519 --> 00:20:04.039
saying that if it were to continue, we would all get a band.

260
00:20:04.960 --> 00:20:11.200
Yeah, I've been in discord service
before. That's not true. Were

261
00:20:11.240 --> 00:20:15.799
not We were not in a server. Sure, we were just in Okay.

262
00:20:15.920 --> 00:20:18.960
So, Josie, I know your
next question, and you're like,

263
00:20:19.000 --> 00:20:22.279
well, how is that possible?
It is not. Okay, I'm just

264
00:20:22.319 --> 00:20:26.640
making sure I'm not the crazy one. No, you're not the crazy one.

265
00:20:26.720 --> 00:20:33.519
Okay. So and and she kept
with this. So over we played

266
00:20:33.599 --> 00:20:37.200
every two weeks when we were playing
UM. So over the course of the

267
00:20:37.200 --> 00:20:41.960
two weeks, I do my research
and I find out that her what is

268
00:20:42.000 --> 00:20:48.440
spewing from her craw is absolute horseshit, and I completely plan out on calling

269
00:20:48.440 --> 00:20:52.519
her bullshit out the next session whenever
she was in. So the next session

270
00:20:52.559 --> 00:20:57.000
comes in, she's not there.
UM and I have the good graces of

271
00:20:57.039 --> 00:21:00.759
the rest of the PCs. We're
all talking back and forth throughout the whole

272
00:21:00.759 --> 00:21:04.480
time, saying, we all know
this is bullshit. So we talked to

273
00:21:04.519 --> 00:21:08.279
the DM and we say, all
right, we come to what we have

274
00:21:08.519 --> 00:21:15.599
a fifteen minute civilized discussion. So
for next time, for this session,

275
00:21:15.880 --> 00:21:18.480
we will do as she asks.
But for next session, we will build

276
00:21:18.519 --> 00:21:23.200
our own server, set it to
age appropriate so that there is no thing

277
00:21:23.319 --> 00:21:26.039
that can go wrong, so that
we can do we can play as we

278
00:21:26.079 --> 00:21:33.880
want. Yo, that's it,
That's what we'll do. The DM starts

279
00:21:33.160 --> 00:21:40.119
his recap of the previous session and
she comes in. She says to us,

280
00:21:40.359 --> 00:21:45.880
now, we are all grown adults
in this game. Grown. We

281
00:21:45.920 --> 00:21:49.480
are all for own adults out at
least twenty nine years old and up.

282
00:21:51.240 --> 00:21:53.480
She says to us, she's not
going to be in, but she's going

283
00:21:53.559 --> 00:21:59.640
to be monitoring us for a foul
language. If she finds any or here's

284
00:21:59.640 --> 00:22:03.680
any is going to take us aside
and talk to us about it, and

285
00:22:03.759 --> 00:22:07.279
if it continues after that, is
going to put us in a time out

286
00:22:07.839 --> 00:22:11.079
and immediately leaves the chat. Oh
suck my dick, Oh my god,

287
00:22:12.759 --> 00:22:18.880
shit, we flip shit coming into
that and telling us that bullshit. No,

288
00:22:19.119 --> 00:22:25.160
we're done with you. So we'd
take a ten minute break to cool

289
00:22:25.200 --> 00:22:30.000
off. And I have a separate
server that I have played on for other

290
00:22:30.319 --> 00:22:33.319
you know, D and D play
you through as before. So I send

291
00:22:33.359 --> 00:22:37.119
everyone minus her an invite so that
we could play in mind, not have

292
00:22:37.160 --> 00:22:41.079
to deal with her fucking bullshit,
and we could play as we want.

293
00:22:41.920 --> 00:22:47.720
Cool. Everything's hunky dory. We
get in now. On the previous session,

294
00:22:47.880 --> 00:22:51.680
we knew we were going to be
accosted. We were on a ship

295
00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:56.039
that was being bombarded by other people, so we knew immediately we were going

296
00:22:56.079 --> 00:22:59.920
to be in combat. So that's
the first thing that happens, is we

297
00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:06.039
getting to combat. It's seven on
four, not bad odds. Two rounds

298
00:23:06.039 --> 00:23:11.640
in. He brings in other NPCs
that are of significantly higher CR rating we

299
00:23:11.720 --> 00:23:18.000
have we probably have a combined total
of around one hundred hip points. Ish.

300
00:23:18.119 --> 00:23:22.960
Each one of these new ones has
at least one hundred each. So

301
00:23:22.200 --> 00:23:26.160
he had he had this on Albert
Rodeo so, and he had their hit

302
00:23:26.200 --> 00:23:30.480
points listed so we could see what
they were using. And I so we

303
00:23:30.599 --> 00:23:33.319
knew we saw their hip points,
saying we knew what was going on.

304
00:23:34.039 --> 00:23:38.240
I knew where this character class was
coming from because I tried to help him

305
00:23:38.559 --> 00:23:42.680
develop a character class for what was
going on, what he wanted to do

306
00:23:42.720 --> 00:23:47.079
in here. So I knew exactly
where these were coming from, and I

307
00:23:47.200 --> 00:23:52.920
knew that they were at least level
twelve whereas we were level three. Yeah

308
00:23:52.000 --> 00:23:56.799
yep, So but for why why
what was the point of that? Hang

309
00:23:56.839 --> 00:24:03.319
on? I'm getting to it.
So only a couple rounds of combat in

310
00:24:03.839 --> 00:24:07.200
Everyone's Dead, my character has one
hit point, jumps off the front of

311
00:24:07.200 --> 00:24:12.559
the boat, flips off the middle
finger, and away we go naturally into

312
00:24:12.599 --> 00:24:21.799
the drink because he tp hate us
and ends the campaign. What the hat?

313
00:24:23.359 --> 00:24:30.039
It was New Year's Eve? What
the okay? It was New Year's

314
00:24:30.400 --> 00:24:36.559
New Year? Yeah, new year, new campaign? Yeah whatever? He

315
00:24:36.680 --> 00:24:38.839
asked me, as I was the
last one in the discord, if I

316
00:24:38.839 --> 00:24:53.200
would like to play again? What'd
you say? Maybe I would like this

317
00:24:53.240 --> 00:24:56.720
game to continue so we can get
more content out of it. Each of

318
00:24:56.799 --> 00:25:00.319
each of these, each of these
individually could have been an episode. Oh,

319
00:25:00.359 --> 00:25:04.519
I'm still trying to process all of
this information. He puts so much

320
00:25:04.559 --> 00:25:11.920
work into into world building to such
an extreme level, only to be like,

321
00:25:11.319 --> 00:25:15.599
now you're all dead and system creation. Don't forget that part. Yeah,

322
00:25:15.720 --> 00:25:22.000
he built a new five type of
sessions, five five sessions that was

323
00:25:22.039 --> 00:25:29.240
only five. Wow, that's impressive
for five does a whole lot of horror.

324
00:25:30.039 --> 00:25:32.759
So a lot of time. So
I don't know. You got you

325
00:25:32.839 --> 00:25:34.119
got your you got your your cheaching
in front of you. So we've got

326
00:25:34.200 --> 00:25:40.480
a very long backstory m or very
very long like like world building, Uh,

327
00:25:40.920 --> 00:25:45.079
required reading pdf document lots of world
building is great, required reading multiple

328
00:25:45.119 --> 00:25:52.519
page document. Stop, I'm not
going to do it. Maybe what's that'll

329
00:25:52.559 --> 00:25:55.759
be? Like? Wait, I
don't understand. Is that Duke new Coomb.

330
00:25:55.799 --> 00:25:57.440
He's like that's a lot of words. Too bad, I'm not reading

331
00:25:57.480 --> 00:26:03.839
them. Yeah, you get one
paragraph and done. Yeah, I'll give

332
00:26:03.839 --> 00:26:06.880
you. I'll give you a page. Yeah, and if it's great front

333
00:26:06.880 --> 00:26:11.599
and back. Um, so that's
that's number one. Then we got a

334
00:26:11.680 --> 00:26:17.359
mishmash of lots of different systems guarantee
taking the worst of each one. Yeah,

335
00:26:17.359 --> 00:26:22.720
okay, we got charts and graphs
uh, filling up entire binders that

336
00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:27.200
you can't sort through. Um,
every every item available to you at all

337
00:26:27.240 --> 00:26:32.920
times, whether or not you deserve
it, completely breaking everything, which is

338
00:26:32.920 --> 00:26:36.359
fine because he didn't read the rules
and doesn't know how bad they actually are

339
00:26:36.400 --> 00:26:40.400
for the game. Um weapons that
are all redundant. Uh, and that's

340
00:26:40.400 --> 00:26:42.680
just the game itself. Then we
got a I'm even gonna say, a

341
00:26:42.720 --> 00:26:47.440
player, she didn't even play,
just a nuisance, just someone coming in,

342
00:26:48.079 --> 00:26:51.079
just a hall monitor they want to
show up, a troll. Yeah,

343
00:26:51.319 --> 00:26:52.559
it's literally just somebody to come in
and be like me, me me,

344
00:26:52.559 --> 00:26:56.599
me me me ye. Unfortunately she
wasn't random. She was supposed to

345
00:26:56.599 --> 00:27:03.720
be the dam's girlfriend. Well,
that explains how we got lays a lot.

346
00:27:03.720 --> 00:27:06.680
Actually, yeah, it actually kind
of explains for me why the campaign

347
00:27:06.799 --> 00:27:08.799
ended after you were like, let's
move away from here. Huh yeah,

348
00:27:08.880 --> 00:27:12.400
yeah, why he blew it up
at that point. Yeah, I didn't

349
00:27:12.400 --> 00:27:15.839
want to assume that was the case, but like the whole time, I'm

350
00:27:15.839 --> 00:27:18.680
thinking that's gonna be the case.
Yeah. That was my first question was

351
00:27:18.720 --> 00:27:25.599
were they Oh yes, they were
in Okay. She she wanted a she

352
00:27:25.640 --> 00:27:30.000
wanted like a squeaky clean server and
couldn't get it. I am no,

353
00:27:30.200 --> 00:27:33.680
she was not going to get it
with me. Yeah no, and not

354
00:27:33.720 --> 00:27:38.240
mynas Yeah. Ridiculous. Uh So, luckily that game is far is well

355
00:27:38.279 --> 00:27:41.400
well over by this point. Oh
yeah, well over. Are you in

356
00:27:41.440 --> 00:27:47.319
better games now? Um? Actually
I am dming a Lost Mine of fan

357
00:27:47.359 --> 00:27:51.440
Delver campaign for the other PCs that
were in that group, along with a

358
00:27:51.440 --> 00:27:56.440
few others, and fantastic story.
Yeah, giving them a good campaign.

359
00:27:56.480 --> 00:27:59.440
One of the morals of the story
is that if you want to be assured

360
00:27:59.480 --> 00:28:04.680
of a good game, you run
it yourself. That's yeah. And that

361
00:28:04.759 --> 00:28:07.839
was one thing that I told him
I did not want, as I said,

362
00:28:07.880 --> 00:28:12.160
one of the pcason that had only
played two sessions. Yea, ever,

363
00:28:12.799 --> 00:28:19.640
I want right in the morning and
there's a lizard person. Yeah.

364
00:28:19.720 --> 00:28:22.920
Yeah, I Lost Mines is such
a good one for new players too.

365
00:28:23.000 --> 00:28:26.400
Yes, that's that that worked out
really well. Um yeah, the story

366
00:28:26.480 --> 00:28:32.559
is absolutely nuts. Um like,
uh, yeah, it's absolutely delivered.

367
00:28:32.640 --> 00:28:36.279
So they forgot the worst part though, which was that they did a full

368
00:28:36.359 --> 00:28:42.759
session shopping montage. Oh, because
I blocked it from my memory. A

369
00:28:42.920 --> 00:28:47.640
full session of shopping God. Oh
that's yeah, I blocked that out.

370
00:28:47.680 --> 00:28:52.319
That was that. I'm still stunned. Honestly. Good for you. You

371
00:28:52.400 --> 00:28:56.599
put up with a lot of shit. I don't know how I just did.

372
00:28:56.680 --> 00:28:59.880
I just wanted to play my character
because I thought he was cool.

373
00:29:00.079 --> 00:29:02.680
Mike, when you got to the
young said, it was only five sessions

374
00:29:02.799 --> 00:29:06.359
for all of that. That was. It packed a lot of bad into

375
00:29:06.960 --> 00:29:10.519
a very little bit. Time.
Is the Horror Story speed Run? Sort

376
00:29:10.519 --> 00:29:15.200
of a yeah? Yeah kind of? Yeah? That that that the Horror

377
00:29:15.200 --> 00:29:21.519
Story Speed Run? Yeah that's a
title. Um. Uh the character that

378
00:29:21.599 --> 00:29:25.680
you that you kept it? You
said you're stuck around because you enjoy your

379
00:29:25.759 --> 00:29:29.640
character. Uh. Is that character
involved in your in your current game?

380
00:29:30.200 --> 00:29:37.599
Ums? Not currently okay, UM, somewhere he is saved. That character

381
00:29:37.640 --> 00:29:42.079
will make an appearance somewhere and has
made an appearance somewhere as UM one of

382
00:29:42.079 --> 00:29:45.920
the PCs in the campaign that I'm
running. UM for a one shot d

383
00:29:47.200 --> 00:29:51.759
M something for me and another player
and brought that character to life in that

384
00:29:52.119 --> 00:29:56.079
in that in that one shot,
we'll make sure that character is okay.

385
00:29:56.160 --> 00:29:59.880
Oh yeah, no, yeah,
that character is great, great, survived.

386
00:30:00.039 --> 00:30:03.880
Hell, he's got to stay alive. Off the starboard bow, you

387
00:30:03.920 --> 00:30:08.000
see someone clinging to a piece of
driftwood. He seems to be giving the

388
00:30:08.039 --> 00:30:15.759
sun, giving the sun a finger. He's swearing at the sharks that are

389
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:18.799
swimming around him. Mike, thanks
so much for your story, man,

390
00:30:19.200 --> 00:30:22.240
Thanks for coming on, Thanks for
listening. Um, thank you for having

391
00:30:22.279 --> 00:30:26.240
me. Yeah yeah, very cool. Thanks for actually responding to to my

392
00:30:26.319 --> 00:30:29.359
call for stories. I'm gonna throw
us out there. I couldn't let that

393
00:30:29.400 --> 00:30:33.440
one pass up. Couldn't let that
pass so glad you didn't know what a

394
00:30:33.440 --> 00:30:37.880
story about. I'm gonna throw this
out there to anybody who wants to come

395
00:30:37.880 --> 00:30:38.920
on and tell their story, or
at least just send us their story.

396
00:30:40.000 --> 00:30:42.000
We can read it for you if
you're If you're camera shy, and that's

397
00:30:42.039 --> 00:30:47.039
cool too, but I love to
be performative. Go reach out to us.

398
00:30:47.200 --> 00:30:49.079
Curmudgeons and Dragons pot at gmail dot
com is how to reach out to

399
00:30:49.240 --> 00:30:52.799
us. Everything we do is on
Curmudgeon and Dragons dot com. Um,

400
00:30:52.880 --> 00:30:56.839
Mike anything. Are you doing anything
you plug anything or uh or just I

401
00:30:56.880 --> 00:31:00.160
don't do anything. I just have
some of my fancy some of the stuff

402
00:31:00.200 --> 00:31:04.759
that I'm into, m D and
D related nad pod if that's allowed,

403
00:31:04.880 --> 00:31:08.359
or Dungeon Run. Yeah, I'm
sorry, don't you run enough familiar with

404
00:31:08.359 --> 00:31:11.039
but nad pod to listen to daily. So Michael, thank you so much,

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00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:15.400
James, Josie as always, thank
you so gay so much for being

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00:31:15.480 --> 00:31:18.640
on the show with me and keeping
this thing going. And thank you adventurers,

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00:31:23.000 --> 00:31:26.640
thank you for listening to Courmudgeons and
Jagons. Please share this with your

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00:31:26.680 --> 00:31:32.240
favorite adventures, leave a review on
Apple, and follow us on social media.

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00:31:32.680 --> 00:31:37.039
All links to be found at Courmudgeons
and Dragons dot com. Practice Safe

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00:31:37.079 --> 00:31:37.319
Adventuring my Friends,