Strongest Heroes On The Planet? Time For Aliens!

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Sometimes talking with friends feels like role
playing. Sometimes it feels like comeback,

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join us at the round table and
roll an isha too. This is Curmudgeons

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and Dragons. Hello adventurers, Welcome
to Curmudgeons the Dragons, Moneys Jason Portizo

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as always, I enjoy me.
Mister Jim Crocker, I think you mean

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Curmudgeons and Dragons live. Have you
had that joke last episode? I'm gonna

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make it because I am so happy
that we are all together in the same

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room here. It's totally cool.
Josie's the one that's not live. You

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don't mean it's it's it's like three
quarters live today. All right, Yeah,

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we're doing right. One day I'll
be live too. Jim Crocker is

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here. I am here, Yes, Josie Daz is here. Hello,

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coming to us live via satellite.
Is that anything anymore? Uh M?

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Jim and I are are live in
person at the Keep in Brick, New

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Jersey. Josie coming to us online
from from England, and we are here

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once again with Tony Bogan, owner
operator of the Keep in Brick, New

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Jersey. My favorite FLGS. Oh
yeah, that would be me. Uh.

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We we had a nice launch at
with Tony for last week's episode,

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and we did not get into Tony's
favorite game story. So, uh,

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is this is this like a is
this more of a horror story a wholesome

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story? What kind of direction are
we getting into? It's not a horror

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story. It actually starts off as
a the DM as an antagonist. Isn't

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an object lesson maybe or a or
a parable or more two teenage boys that

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decided they were pissy with each other
for about a week and then have fun

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with it. That's really what it. Let's fix the story in details,

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but I can already see it playing
out. Oh yeah, let's get into

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the story and we'll decide how horrific
it is. So little background for Josie

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or anybody that had that didn't see
the story episode or got bored with me

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talking so long for both the episode
about the store. Go listen to last

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week's episode. Yeah, also one
on nine. Don't quote me on that.

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Believe it's episode one on nine.
You cannot imagine how much of my

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shitty rambling Jason cuts out of the
episodes. It's a lot. I was

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wondering why she doesn't talk that much. I try to cut her entirely out

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of the show. We can listen
say the word I'll will do my homework,

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babe. No, she threatened to
leave the show and I literally begged

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her so to please sure. So, amongst other things, I've been friends

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with my one friend Rich since we
were years old, and we've been playing

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D and D all that time.
We started in nineteen seventy six playing D

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and D and have played to this
very day. So he's been my forever

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DM and we were would have been
junior year in high school, so I

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would have been seventeen. Just got
my driver's license in November, so we

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had already been playing for almost a
decade together. And two of my characters

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Zan Darzan and gleepwer which anybody that's
the D D fan that goes to old

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school knows that Gleepworp came from the
module against the Giants, and after we

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were done playing that module, we
like the character so much that we kept

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it because he's actually a good wizard
that becomes a bad wizard. Actually,

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they weren't cold wizards back then.
Wizard was a title when you reached a

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certain level. They were user.
Yeah, general magic user. That was

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all there is. The only class
was magic user. Every other level every

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other illusionist, wizard, arch mage, mage, et cetera. Were all

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a title that you got as you
reached a certain level, just like going

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from corporal to sergeant to lieutenant to
that's all they were. That's kind of

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cool. Actually, I don't ran
an arms champion hero superhero. That was

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one of the things you could be
as a fighter. So yeah, but

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you were a fighter, yeah,
that was that was your actual class was

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fighter or magic user or thief or
dwarf or right, that is okay,

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all right. So when we started
first with the original you know, the

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white box edition in nineteen seventy six, and then eventually we moved to Advanced

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Dungeons and Dragons when it first came
out, which now referred to his first

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edition, but at the time it
was just a D and D and we

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stuck with it ever since. So, like I said, we had been

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playing for almost a decade by this
time, and two of my original character

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were two the only characters that survived. If you look at my one character

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sheet for zan dar Zani's my half
healf fighter, magic user, thief.

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Because we were big into multi classic
um. His list of fallen comrades is

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like half a page long of la
paper and because yet nobody survived. Also

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side note, all of our original
characters were named interestingly enough, Oh,

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I don't know, Boromere canned off
and know, yeah, we had gim

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Les and all those. Yeah,
because that was our lot, that was

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our world at that stage of the
game nine ten years, so it wasn't

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a lot of properties to borrow stuff
there was there wasn't. And then we

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made up and I look at some
of the names of some like Hobar Mallow

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was a name that I came up
with for another. Yeah, I don't

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know, there was a h O
B A R. I just got so

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excited for us. I can so
fast forward from when we started to junior

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year in high school, and for
whatever reason, I got a phone call

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from Rich saying, Hey, you
know what, I'm kind of tired of

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zandar Zan and gleep or if they're
way too powerful now, you know,

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I'm just tired of them and I
don't want to I don't want to play

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them, and I don't want you
to play them anymore. I'm like,

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well, those are my two main
characters. And as I had mentioned in

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the last episode, you know nobody
played just one character at a time,

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because it was really more than three
or four of us max that would play

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at any one time. And you
weren't getting out of the door of the

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keep in the village of Hamlet without
killing yourself tripping over the doorsill with just

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three players and three player characters,
it just wasn't happening. You know,

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your four hit point magic user was
powerful. He had one magic missile spell.

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It just wasn't a thing. So
we typically played at least two characters,

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so three of us could would have
an adventuring party of six play characters.

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I'm like, yeah, but like
that was the whole point was.

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We wanted them to literally go on
forever to the point where sooner or later,

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our other player characters and other people
that would come and we would play

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with would adventure in our world that
our player characters created. You know,

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all of a sudden, it was
our castle, it was our keep,

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it was our dungeon, it was
our village. Whatever. So I was

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kind of annoyed, and I was
like, you know, why are you

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be in such a jerk about this? Well, you know, I want

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to blah blah blah. And it
went back and forth. So we spent

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a week of almost not talking to
each other where the battle in D and

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D translated into a battle in real
life, and it took about a week

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or two at the most, and
eventually we kind of realized this was really

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stupid to be getting pissy with each
other in real life over our player characters

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from D and D, but not
completely because it was my PC that had

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survived all of these trials and tribulations
over the last almost decade. So eventually

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we said, well, how are
we going to get past this? Because

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he wanted to adventure, have adventure
and run adventures with new player characters or

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some of our lower level characters that
we had created, and for no other

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reason I found out because the two
main characters are so powerful that they could

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take the low level characters with them
and help them along. It's like,

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well, yeah, but that's that's
what would happen. You know, when

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you get a new job, they
don't throw you in with another rookie and

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oh, just figure out how to
do the work. Yeah, you'll figure

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it out sooner or later. You
know, our business can survive with you

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guys putting the wrong parts in the
wrong places and no you get somebody that's

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experienced and you know you're under their
tutelage, and they bring you along and

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they show So that was, you
know, my thinking of it, and

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I had thought was rich As at
the time. So eventually we decided,

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you know what, we'll make a
challenge out of it instead, because we're

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not going to let this get an
interfere with our friendship. It was stupid.

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We realized it was stupid, and
so we decided to make a competition

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a contest. You can me meaning
me rich As, like you can do

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anything that your characters can do.
But just remember one of the rules,

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the thumb that we always had was
if it wasn't written down, it didn't

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happen. So because we were so
fucked the point being that, you know,

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there was times where we might not
get to play for two or three

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weeks, but our characters, we
wanted to still have their lives go on,

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so you know, I couldn't just
make stuff up. I would go

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to rich and say, hey,
you know, for the last six months,

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you know so and so has been
doing this, and so and so

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has been doing that, and this
is what they are, and here's the

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list of supplies that I bought,
you know, because eventually we got to

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the point of castles and strongholds and
ships in the whole nine yards. So

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rich was one of those while we're
not gonna I'm not gonna do encumbrance down

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to the single GP weight of everything
you're carrying. General encumbrance was an issue.

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You know, I can't go out
with no bags of holding in ten

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thousand pounds of gold pieces just not
going to happen. So that was about

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the level that we did it too. But anything that happened out of the

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play when we were together, it
had to be written down. Did it

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also need to be um sorry,
did it also need to be proofread by

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your DM to be like, yes, that's acceptable that you did. Oh,

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absolutely no. I had to bring
everything to them because, like I

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said, I couldn't just make shit
up and say, oh, yeah,

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by the way, you know,
well we have forty foot solid gold statue.

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Now you know they know that kind
of stuff couldn't happen. I love

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that this story is so back when
we invented downtime in DNA close that's fantastic.

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Yeah, that would have been nineteen
eighty six when we had this this

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fight and we've been doing it for
a long time. That's a parallel development

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thing where everybody was like, well, the rules don't do this, but

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we want to do this, yeah, and so everybody kind of figured out

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their own way to do it.
That's I love that story in that vein

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too. People don't realize the first
edition, first printing of The Dungeon Master

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Guy had tables in it that were
wrong. The math actually did up.

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Now they were fixed in later printings
and Urata sheets. But you know,

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the DMS Guy came out in seventy
eight, I was ten years old.

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We just figured we didn't understand it, so we just made shit up.

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Fast forward like five years later.
We look at it and and be like,

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oh, you mean that's how we
were Ye had no idea Wolfs So

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mind you now at this stage of
the game, my magic user Gleepework,

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which I did not make that name
up. He comes from the module against

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the Giants Um and we had played
that module and we liked the character so

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much that my DM let me keep
him as my magic User. And zandar

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Zan, who was my main character
who's the half out fighter magic user thief.

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They are now powerful enough to the
point where there's no monster in the

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monster manual statted as printed that they
couldn't defeat. We had kicked ass when

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Deities and demiods demigods came out,
Oh good, which is called what the

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heck? Was the reprint of that
Legends and Lore the reprint, but originally

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it was Deities and Demigods. Uh. When I saw Elric was statted in,

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there was a victim of the seat
tanny panic. Do you think probably

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that? Yeah? And there was
also I mean they also got sued because

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they included two actual pantheons they didn't
have permitted. Actually didn't quite happened that

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way. It wasn't so much a
lawsuit as it was a there was stern

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the same ip had been both Michael
Morcox, who's in by the way,

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Michael Morcock group that I belonged to
him on Facebook that he's active in.

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Yeah. Um, which is why
I brought up Elric because when I saw

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they stated Elric in the Dds and
Debither, one of my favorite fantasy series

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of books. Um, and I
love the character. Yeah, run around

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with storm Ringer. Yeah, that
was why all our characters were a chaotic

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alignment of some form or another.
So at any rate. Um. What

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happened with that was was that both
Michael Moorecock and I forget the name of

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the originator of the Cthulhut, thank
you, suff Yeah right, all the

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Chaosium stuff they had ended up that
Morcocks stuff had been he agreed to allow

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both TSR and someone else which I
think it was Chaosium yea, to use

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it at the same time, and
either legal teams realized that the others had

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been the same thing. Yeah,
so that's where that came from. I

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knew there was some kind of freakis
that like it wasn't in subsequent editions,

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and that it was not. Yeah, there's only two printings of DDS and

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Demigods, the first and second,
that are one hundred and forty four pages

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and have all of the pantheons in
them than every printing after that was only

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one hundred and twenty eight pages,
and missus is missing those two that have

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Cthulhu stat it out right. Yeah. Yeah, So again uber powerful characters,

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especially for advanced dungeons and dragons in
the first edition at that stage of

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the game, mind you, over
the next thirty years since then, they've

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become even more powerful. So we
still kept it interesting because it was like,

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all right, throw ten dragons at
us, let's see what happens,

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you know, because if we're gonna
lose. We learned long ago that I

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always anytime we would what's your next
move going to be, we would quote

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Monty Python and the Holy Grail run
away. We learned a long time ago

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that that was like the best move
that any adventuring group can have in their

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repertoire was runaway. Yeah, not
be afraid to flee when it's the right

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kind of It took about a dozen
player character deaths before we finally got through

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our thick heads, but we did
realize it. So as long as it

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was written down, any of the
stuff that I had, you know,

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whether it was strongholds we had made
or you know, stockpiles of stores and

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things like that, and the same
thing, you know, we could do

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it, We could use it.
It would be accessible to us. And

204
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the same thing was true with Rich. He could do anything to us,

205
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to the group, to the player
characters, as long as it wasn't a

206
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how did we say it before?
You can't kill the party by blowing up

207
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the planet, Yeah, like you
have you have to give us a fighting

208
00:13:28.840 --> 00:13:33.000
chance. Okay, so no meteor
shower that. Oh yeah, there's a

209
00:13:33.000 --> 00:13:35.200
meteor storm and the one rock hits
the bigger twice the size of what wiped

210
00:13:35.240 --> 00:13:39.080
out the dinosaurs. So you're all
dead. Interglathic rocks fall everyone. Yeah.

211
00:13:39.120 --> 00:13:45.080
So after about we typically did at
least twice a month. We tried

212
00:13:45.080 --> 00:13:48.000
to adventure work together, but we
played at least twice a month at that

213
00:13:48.080 --> 00:13:50.799
stage of the game, because by
then we had sports and girlfriends and cars

214
00:13:50.799 --> 00:13:54.960
and that kind of stuff coming into
the play. What happened was was Rich

215
00:13:54.080 --> 00:14:01.759
realized that there was basically almost no
amount of d means Gods, you name

216
00:14:01.840 --> 00:14:05.440
it, like we could. We
couldn't necessarily defeat God on their plane of

217
00:14:05.519 --> 00:14:09.039
existence. No amount of playing fair
that would, right, Yeah, exactly

218
00:14:09.120 --> 00:14:11.799
right. That you guys couldn't handle
so or run away from Yes, exactly

219
00:14:13.080 --> 00:14:15.759
know. When you've got a lot
that's handling it. When you've got a

220
00:14:15.759 --> 00:14:18.679
fashion a thirty plus level magic user, yeah, he's really tough to be.

221
00:14:18.960 --> 00:14:22.120
It doesn't matter that it was a
human and doesn't have a whole lot

222
00:14:22.159 --> 00:14:26.440
of hit points. Um and teleport
is a great, great way to get

223
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away from stuff, especially when your
character has been around a lot long enough

224
00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:35.440
that he can move large quantities of
whether it be humans or pack mules or

225
00:14:35.480 --> 00:14:39.320
whatever with the snap of a thumb, your high level cleric with word of

226
00:14:39.360 --> 00:14:45.559
recall. Yeah, that's also very
handy put it, yeah cleric as a

227
00:14:45.639 --> 00:14:48.879
dwarf um so at any rate,
so rich decided, right, well,

228
00:14:48.879 --> 00:14:50.639
how am I going to do this? Well. One of the things that

229
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we never realized when we first started
playing is as eight nine year olds,

230
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was we only did high fantasy.
There was no gunpowder, There were no

231
00:14:58.960 --> 00:15:03.200
know, nothing mechanic goal or machinery
beyond it typical um, you know,

232
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medieval style stuff. There was no
guns, nothing like that. But when

233
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we when the module Expedition to the
Barrier, peaks came out, which we

234
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looked at it in one of in
the picture of these adventures, and one

235
00:15:16.799 --> 00:15:20.320
of them is holding what looks like
a ray gun shooting a laser at something

236
00:15:20.399 --> 00:15:22.159
like you can do that, right, you know? That was like twelve

237
00:15:22.240 --> 00:15:24.200
year old us going, wow,
we didn't know you could. So we

238
00:15:24.200 --> 00:15:28.600
can do star Wars with with dungeons
and dragons. So then nothing was off

239
00:15:28.600 --> 00:15:31.759
the table for us, even though
we didn't typically integrate those things into our

240
00:15:31.799 --> 00:15:37.080
campaigns on a regular basis. They
were there for us. So Rich decided,

241
00:15:37.519 --> 00:15:41.039
how am I going to beat these
guys? Aliens? Aliens was the

242
00:15:41.600 --> 00:15:46.639
great solution so at this stage of
the game, and he went the dragon

243
00:15:46.639 --> 00:15:50.840
ball z route. Yep, well
see and for me, unfortunately for me

244
00:15:50.960 --> 00:15:52.360
or fortunately for me, depending on
which way you look at it. I

245
00:15:52.440 --> 00:15:56.879
was never big anime style cartoons.
So one of the only ones that existed

246
00:15:56.879 --> 00:16:00.200
when I was a child was speed
Racer, and I was not a fan

247
00:16:00.240 --> 00:16:04.120
of speed Racer. And then I
saw and then I saw Starblazers when it

248
00:16:04.159 --> 00:16:07.440
came out. And if you don't
know what Starblazers is a thirty seconds or

249
00:16:07.519 --> 00:16:11.320
less, I'm a huge World War
two World War two buff. So picture

250
00:16:11.320 --> 00:16:17.399
Aliens bomb planet Earth with meteors make
the surface uninhabitable, so humans are below

251
00:16:17.600 --> 00:16:19.159
the surface. But we've got to
get off our planet and get to a

252
00:16:19.200 --> 00:16:23.120
friendly planet in order to get the
cure to fix our planet. So there's

253
00:16:23.120 --> 00:16:27.840
the battleship Yamato sitting on the bottom
of the now empty and dry Pacific Ocean.

254
00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:33.039
They rebuild it from the bottom up, so the old rusted shell is

255
00:16:33.039 --> 00:16:36.080
on the outside of it, and
then it breaks through when it comes out

256
00:16:36.120 --> 00:16:38.399
and they've got a World War two
battleship that's now a spaceship and shoots lasers

257
00:16:38.399 --> 00:16:45.639
out of the turrets and everything.
And I loved it as a child.

258
00:16:47.159 --> 00:16:49.240
So that was kind of where Rich
got the idea from, was well,

259
00:16:49.279 --> 00:16:52.159
you know your biggest so you know, we'll they'll just be lasers and they'll

260
00:16:52.200 --> 00:16:56.200
be bombs and they'll be like,
now what do I do? So what

261
00:16:56.320 --> 00:17:00.320
happened was was and we were also
big into Battlestar Galactica the original with you

262
00:17:00.360 --> 00:17:04.119
know, Lauren Green and the whole
nine yards, so all of that tied

263
00:17:04.160 --> 00:17:10.279
into what he planned. So what
happened was was they the Aliens came and

264
00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:12.079
they landed on my island, because
my guys had an island that we had

265
00:17:12.079 --> 00:17:15.920
taken over and that was where we
built our stronghold and had our ships in

266
00:17:15.920 --> 00:17:19.359
the whole nine yards. So when
push came to shove, the only alternative

267
00:17:19.519 --> 00:17:22.200
was get the hell out of there, because there was we just could not

268
00:17:22.319 --> 00:17:29.640
compete with the aliens technology because even
the most powerful flames and the most powerful

269
00:17:29.680 --> 00:17:33.279
management shields sorry, just not going
to happen. So my characters had to

270
00:17:33.319 --> 00:17:37.240
high tail it. Out of there, so while we were still alive,

271
00:17:37.160 --> 00:17:41.640
it'd be like you and me being
picked up and dropped off onto a you

272
00:17:41.680 --> 00:17:45.640
know, a desert island with no
resources, just your wits about you.

273
00:17:45.680 --> 00:17:49.240
Because all of our resources were in
our stronghold, or so my dungeon mastered.

274
00:17:49.319 --> 00:17:53.160
Rich thought, because if it's not
written down, it didn't happen.

275
00:17:55.039 --> 00:17:59.160
So out came the book and the
pages with the lists of all of the

276
00:17:59.319 --> 00:18:00.920
stashes that we had, which,
for those of you who are not working

277
00:18:00.920 --> 00:18:06.039
on the YouTube right now, the
actual book is here and intact, which

278
00:18:06.119 --> 00:18:11.039
is this binder. Will there's Tony's
twelve year old hands writing one of the

279
00:18:11.119 --> 00:18:17.759
characters. Oh yeah, oh that's
really cool. That's so cool. I

280
00:18:17.799 --> 00:18:23.160
can't keep notes between So there's the
stronghold. That's crazy. Yeah, so

281
00:18:23.720 --> 00:18:26.759
I if if it's cool with you, I'd love to get a have scans

282
00:18:26.759 --> 00:18:30.559
of it. Oh yeah, okay, it's all we'll find. We'll find

283
00:18:30.559 --> 00:18:33.000
a way of including that in the
show notes. Go go check the show

284
00:18:33.039 --> 00:18:37.240
notes and on that to see what
we're seeing right now. So we had

285
00:18:37.359 --> 00:18:40.680
enough that we could, at least
as far as Richard was concerned, we

286
00:18:40.720 --> 00:18:45.359
have had enough resources accessible within a
reasonable distance to get to to you know,

287
00:18:45.440 --> 00:18:48.279
rearm ourselves things like that. Well, because the flip side of if

288
00:18:48.319 --> 00:18:52.559
you didn't write it down, it
didn't happen, is if you did write

289
00:18:52.599 --> 00:18:57.160
it down, it did. It
did happen absolutely, whether rich remembered that

290
00:18:57.200 --> 00:19:02.119
you had written it down or not. So, yeah, it was all

291
00:19:02.160 --> 00:19:06.680
there. So one of the things
that had happened in five or six years

292
00:19:06.680 --> 00:19:08.839
earlier was I don't know if any
of you're familiar with the from the Monster

293
00:19:08.880 --> 00:19:14.559
Manual Mites m I T S movie. I'm familiar with the real world mites

294
00:19:15.200 --> 00:19:18.119
right there you go. The best
way I can describe it is, um,

295
00:19:18.200 --> 00:19:21.440
if you know, if you remember, I'm looking at you guys,

296
00:19:21.440 --> 00:19:25.359
because you're closer to my age.
Um the Gremlin from Bugs Bunny. Yeah,

297
00:19:25.400 --> 00:19:27.240
sure, right, Well, Gremlin's
were a thing, especially during World

298
00:19:27.279 --> 00:19:30.079
War Two. Anytime someone must have
been Gremlins. Gremlins must have done it.

299
00:19:30.119 --> 00:19:34.559
That was based on the Twilight Zone, right Greenlin. So also Gremlin's

300
00:19:34.640 --> 00:19:40.240
great movie gave me nightmares as a
child. Love it. Oh yeah,

301
00:19:40.480 --> 00:19:45.000
Um, Gremlas too, not so
much. But Mark why my family was

302
00:19:45.039 --> 00:19:49.440
still somebody will turn light and somebody
will go right light bright light. I

303
00:19:49.480 --> 00:19:52.680
can my voice doesn't go that high, so I can't make it sound like

304
00:19:53.359 --> 00:19:57.640
that's closer to it, Josie,
Josie starts that high. Yeah, I

305
00:19:57.720 --> 00:20:03.920
just know. We had come across
a bunch of these, So they're nefarious

306
00:20:03.960 --> 00:20:08.400
little creatures and they're just brutal,
and they're closer to gremlins, to be

307
00:20:08.440 --> 00:20:12.759
honest with you. They're in the
Oney Monster many they're even drawn similar to

308
00:20:12.799 --> 00:20:18.880
that. So my one powerful magic
user, gleap Orp, had been basically

309
00:20:18.920 --> 00:20:22.559
had we had come upon nests of
these things that were being kept by some

310
00:20:22.680 --> 00:20:25.559
bad guy that was you know,
you would use them and send them into

311
00:20:25.599 --> 00:20:27.720
towns to you know, rek Havoc, which we thought was a great idea,

312
00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:30.759
so we took it for ourselves once
we defeated him, So we basically

313
00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:36.160
farmed them. So we had mass
quantities of these things that we would sell

314
00:20:36.680 --> 00:20:38.599
to passing advent like, hey,
got a problem at home? You know

315
00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:42.640
there used to be snake oil salesman
lights, Hey, you got a problem

316
00:20:42.640 --> 00:20:45.759
at home. You know, I
haven't trouble to come get a couple of

317
00:20:45.759 --> 00:20:48.920
these, pay us for him and
let them loose and rec Havoc and then

318
00:20:48.960 --> 00:20:51.839
you can you know, come in
and be the big savior. And so

319
00:20:52.240 --> 00:20:55.119
long story short, the problem we
were having was, even though we were

320
00:20:55.119 --> 00:20:59.000
off the island and we had our
strong you know, our stashes of gear

321
00:20:59.079 --> 00:21:03.440
and money and things like that,
everywhere we went didn't last very long because

322
00:21:03.839 --> 00:21:07.559
what could the aliens do? Fly
in spaceships, so there was no place

323
00:21:07.640 --> 00:21:11.440
that was inaccessible to them, even
though it might be inaccessible or difficult to

324
00:21:11.480 --> 00:21:17.240
get to for us. There was
no hiding from them to any great degree

325
00:21:17.319 --> 00:21:21.240
because their scanning technology, you could
you know, underground, the underground wasn't

326
00:21:21.279 --> 00:21:23.039
going to help us. It might
give us enough time to get out before

327
00:21:23.039 --> 00:21:26.559
the bombs worked their way through,
but there was no getting away from it.

328
00:21:26.960 --> 00:21:30.680
So now it was simply a matter
of you know, it was a

329
00:21:30.799 --> 00:21:33.400
chase. It was a cop and
Robert chase scene for the next few sessions

330
00:21:33.480 --> 00:21:38.319
of us always trying to stay one
step ahead of the antagonists that were following

331
00:21:38.400 --> 00:21:41.079
us one way or the other.
And of course we could tell Portle they

332
00:21:41.079 --> 00:21:44.559
could. They had beaming technology.
So one minute it was a ship in

333
00:21:44.599 --> 00:21:47.359
the sky, the next minute it
was one hundred troops on the ground with

334
00:21:47.440 --> 00:21:49.119
laser guns and shields. Are like
damn. So we just couldn't figure a

335
00:21:49.119 --> 00:21:53.200
way to get around it. And
finally, after probably like about six weeks

336
00:21:53.200 --> 00:21:57.640
of this and again we played six
I should say six sessions of US six

337
00:21:57.680 --> 00:22:02.319
weeks, six six times that we
met up playing typically four or five hours

338
00:22:02.319 --> 00:22:04.480
at a clip. I figured,
you know what, I've got to get

339
00:22:04.559 --> 00:22:08.160
rid of these aliens before I can
start to do anything. So we did

340
00:22:08.200 --> 00:22:15.559
a mass teleportation of thousands of mites
onto the airfield that used to be my

341
00:22:15.680 --> 00:22:19.000
island to the spaceship. And my
exact thinking was, that's what the Gremlin

342
00:22:19.079 --> 00:22:22.279
did in Bugs Bunny when he comes
in. When he comes when Bugs Bunny

343
00:22:22.279 --> 00:22:26.559
comes into frame, there's the Gremlin
with a giant shell, you know,

344
00:22:26.680 --> 00:22:27.960
artillery shell, hit in the head
of it with a hammer, trying to

345
00:22:27.960 --> 00:22:32.039
get it to explode. And that's
exactly what my thoughts were. So we

346
00:22:32.160 --> 00:22:36.000
teleported them, not anywheres near where
the islet, to the spaceships, to

347
00:22:36.079 --> 00:22:41.599
all their fighters and everything that were
on my island. Unfortunately, fortunately for

348
00:22:41.720 --> 00:22:44.480
us, it did the job that
it reached the kind of havoc that we

349
00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:49.200
were hoping for. But because of
the roll of the die, there was

350
00:22:49.240 --> 00:22:53.200
a ten percent chance that there would
be a catastrophic result. We agreed ten

351
00:22:53.240 --> 00:22:59.279
percent was it reasonable amount? And
I didn't roll well tell a story.

352
00:22:59.519 --> 00:23:03.920
So what happened next? We got
rid of the aliens and the entire island

353
00:23:03.920 --> 00:23:07.079
as well, because he they basically
set off a new in screwing with the

354
00:23:07.480 --> 00:23:12.079
spaceships. So now the entire island
is gone, completely gone. It's a

355
00:23:12.200 --> 00:23:17.000
it's just a crater underneath the water
now. So that was when the second

356
00:23:17.039 --> 00:23:19.079
where if it wasn't written down,
it didn't happen, comes in so rich

357
00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:21.759
it was like, all right,
well, now what are you going to

358
00:23:21.839 --> 00:23:25.880
do because a lot of those stashes
that you had, as the aliens would

359
00:23:25.920 --> 00:23:29.200
catch up to us, they would
take him out. And that was when

360
00:23:29.200 --> 00:23:32.319
the pad came out and said,
remember this one with all the stocks and

361
00:23:32.400 --> 00:23:34.319
stores, because he would he would
stick with, you know, certain spell

362
00:23:34.359 --> 00:23:40.519
components that were vital spell components.
We had to have not every standard root

363
00:23:40.599 --> 00:23:42.440
and things like that, but if
it was a rare gem, or if

364
00:23:42.440 --> 00:23:45.680
it was a rare root route,
or it was a you know, a

365
00:23:45.680 --> 00:23:48.319
back wing of a certain thing,
we had to have that stuff if we

366
00:23:48.359 --> 00:23:52.279
wanted to use it with any regularity. And the same thing went with other

367
00:23:52.279 --> 00:23:53.640
stores. Same thing with our ship. Like part of that map that I

368
00:23:55.079 --> 00:23:57.119
held up to the screen briefly in
my stronghold, there's a whole section there

369
00:23:57.119 --> 00:24:00.839
that's nothing but farmland. Because if
I'm going to have all these barracks with

370
00:24:00.839 --> 00:24:02.720
troops that go out on these ships, so how they're going to eat?

371
00:24:03.079 --> 00:24:04.680
So we had far you know,
we would do that. We would only

372
00:24:04.680 --> 00:24:07.759
do it once though once it was
done, it was assumed that it would

373
00:24:07.759 --> 00:24:11.720
continue to be done. Once we
came up with a general cost of what

374
00:24:11.720 --> 00:24:15.839
it would cost to maintain something per
week or per month, not with the

375
00:24:15.880 --> 00:24:18.640
regularity that would be required in real
life, but every once in a while

376
00:24:18.640 --> 00:24:22.119
where should be like, it's probably
time to chock off another five thousand GP

377
00:24:22.359 --> 00:24:26.079
for keeping your stuff in so enough
to make it where you didn't just get

378
00:24:26.079 --> 00:24:29.000
everything you wanted for free, and
you couldn't have like I said, you

379
00:24:29.000 --> 00:24:32.799
couldn't carry ten thousand GP with no
bags of holding things like that. Sure,

380
00:24:33.200 --> 00:24:34.880
So that's when the list came out
and it was now here's the real

381
00:24:36.240 --> 00:24:41.359
list of stock in stores that we
had hidden away because we had accumulated so

382
00:24:41.400 --> 00:24:45.640
many magic items, for example,
over the course of almost a decade of

383
00:24:45.640 --> 00:24:49.559
adventuring that we never needed most of
them because we realized once you got to

384
00:24:49.599 --> 00:24:52.519
a certain level, you could you
could get away with not having to have

385
00:24:52.640 --> 00:24:56.640
all of that stuff all the time. So we had massive and of course

386
00:24:56.680 --> 00:24:59.599
what did we do, Well,
you know, we rolled the dice.

387
00:24:59.640 --> 00:25:03.119
We rolled the percentage. Die was
both our friend and our enemy. Um,

388
00:25:03.319 --> 00:25:06.519
what are the chances that of these
twenty different you know stashes that you

389
00:25:06.559 --> 00:25:10.640
have scattered about, how many of
them haven't been looted in then since you

390
00:25:10.680 --> 00:25:14.240
put them in there years ago.
Well, we tried to account for that

391
00:25:14.279 --> 00:25:15.920
as best we could, because what
we would do is again, and this

392
00:25:15.960 --> 00:25:21.480
was only because we had high level
characters that could do it. You dig

393
00:25:21.519 --> 00:25:25.240
a hole, get rid of a
huge area, you know, clear out

394
00:25:25.240 --> 00:25:27.119
a room. You could tell you
we learned you could teleport dirt out of

395
00:25:27.119 --> 00:25:30.200
your way to it, which were
great, and then seal it back up.

396
00:25:30.240 --> 00:25:33.039
And it was forty feet below the
dungeon that you built above it,

397
00:25:33.160 --> 00:25:36.920
and there was only one way to
get there, it was the teleport there.

398
00:25:37.400 --> 00:25:40.200
So we would we did stuff like
that. So we would put five

399
00:25:40.480 --> 00:25:44.559
hundred gp worth of stuff where it
was readily accessible, put a monster or

400
00:25:44.559 --> 00:25:47.640
two there to guard it. And
then now it was done, nobody was

401
00:25:47.640 --> 00:25:49.119
going to dig down forty feet to
try and look for you know, the

402
00:25:49.319 --> 00:25:53.319
no NPC was going to do it. So that was where that came from.

403
00:25:53.400 --> 00:25:59.319
The classic Tomb of Horror's fake tomb. Yeah so yeah, I told

404
00:25:59.359 --> 00:26:00.680
you earlier. We didn't play a
lot of the models, but we pulled

405
00:26:00.720 --> 00:26:04.160
from all yea, yeah, sure, yeah, that's good tech. Yeah.

406
00:26:04.200 --> 00:26:07.960
You know. One of the funny
thing is is that later in life,

407
00:26:07.759 --> 00:26:11.480
one of my favorite TV series,
Babble on five, there's the Evil

408
00:26:11.480 --> 00:26:15.119
Shadows, and one of the ways
that they get rid of the presence of

409
00:26:15.119 --> 00:26:18.640
the Shadows on one of the planets
where they're you know, have taken over

410
00:26:19.440 --> 00:26:25.119
is secretly, overnight, they have
citizens that while they're evacuating most of the

411
00:26:25.160 --> 00:26:27.839
population from this one island that they
were on that their ships were on,

412
00:26:30.599 --> 00:26:34.160
they secretly brought nukes in and left
some people there who sacrificed themselves so the

413
00:26:34.200 --> 00:26:38.240
Shadows didn't notice that there were people
missing and nuked the island. I was

414
00:26:38.279 --> 00:26:44.880
like, wow, Jay Michael Straczinsky
must have looked at our damn adventure wrote

415
00:26:44.960 --> 00:26:48.119
that, But it was, like
I said, it started off as a

416
00:26:48.240 --> 00:26:52.400
fight, it turned into a challenge, and by the time it was done,

417
00:26:52.440 --> 00:26:56.240
it was like, we really are
almost starting over campaign. Yeah.

418
00:26:56.319 --> 00:26:59.599
Yeah, and we had a blast
with that. But so that was my

419
00:26:59.680 --> 00:27:02.480
I guess I couldn't really come up
with a horror story. Yeah, it

420
00:27:02.559 --> 00:27:04.319
was there, the building that fell
on top of one of my I've got

421
00:27:04.319 --> 00:27:07.640
to show into those because especially like
I said in the early editions, and

422
00:27:07.680 --> 00:27:11.200
it was one step above I mentioned, oh, you couldn't survive tripping over

423
00:27:11.200 --> 00:27:15.119
the door still as you walked out
of the original keep, you know,

424
00:27:15.119 --> 00:27:18.160
And yeah, I had a couple
of characters that literally died that way off

425
00:27:18.200 --> 00:27:22.319
their horse. Only had four hit
points to begin with, and guess what

426
00:27:22.680 --> 00:27:26.079
the way we played it was when
you hit zero, you were unconscious.

427
00:27:26.480 --> 00:27:30.720
Anything less than zero was dead.
Oh okay, um we did there and

428
00:27:30.799 --> 00:27:33.640
well, and there were no rules
really that were at that stage show.

429
00:27:33.799 --> 00:27:36.200
We were kind of rules heavy when
we started, because again we were eight,

430
00:27:36.319 --> 00:27:38.839
nine, ten years old, so
there was a lot of imagination,

431
00:27:38.880 --> 00:27:41.519
but it didn't always make sense.
So we would fall back to the rood,

432
00:27:41.519 --> 00:27:44.279
like how do we do that?
Well, let's look up the book

433
00:27:44.279 --> 00:27:47.279
and see what it tells us.
To do. But yeah, I had

434
00:27:47.359 --> 00:27:49.519
more than one character that did this. So but those horror stories were Yes,

435
00:27:49.559 --> 00:27:52.680
I had a character that was riding
on his horse and when he fell

436
00:27:52.720 --> 00:27:53.640
off the horse, he had four
hit points and he hit his head on

437
00:27:53.640 --> 00:27:59.039
a rock and he died. Here's
my horror story. It's a true story,

438
00:27:59.240 --> 00:28:00.720
but it wasn't very interesting. So
the best thing I could think and

439
00:28:00.880 --> 00:28:04.599
I guess it. But the fun
part was I'll take a harrd story.

440
00:28:04.599 --> 00:28:10.039
That's five seconds. Well today,
Ye, that's it, Thanks for watching.

441
00:28:10.079 --> 00:28:12.680
I hope you enjoyed yourself today.
Uh. And again, those two

442
00:28:12.759 --> 00:28:18.079
characters are still alive to this day. In that bind a binder, I

443
00:28:18.119 --> 00:28:21.599
got to somehow spin that out into
half a dozen notes though, So we're

444
00:28:21.599 --> 00:28:26.920
gonna figure out what's going on,
right, uh Tony, I mean so

445
00:28:26.039 --> 00:28:32.000
yeah, not really a horror story, more else like fun. This is

446
00:28:32.039 --> 00:28:36.279
just something you story. Yeah,
but if you can imagine this more stories

447
00:28:37.920 --> 00:28:41.079
old, right, two seventeen year
old friends that have known each other for

448
00:28:41.599 --> 00:28:45.559
as long as they've been playing DD
together. Actually, it would never get

449
00:28:45.599 --> 00:28:51.319
to fisticuffs because Rich is five foot
tall, Like, hey and I became

450
00:28:51.359 --> 00:28:53.559
friends. I'm with you, yeah, but you can't tell. I'm six

451
00:28:53.720 --> 00:28:57.880
four to twenty back then, so
more than two twenty non. Um.

452
00:28:57.960 --> 00:29:02.519
That's how Rich and I became friends
was he was the new kid in school

453
00:29:02.839 --> 00:29:06.559
and this one kid, Mark,
who was my size, was picking on

454
00:29:06.640 --> 00:29:08.039
him in gym class and you didn't
pick on the little kids because there was

455
00:29:08.039 --> 00:29:12.880
no challenge, and I got pissed. Yeah, so I, you know,

456
00:29:14.200 --> 00:29:17.480
got in a fight with Mark and
got in trouble for the fight,

457
00:29:17.519 --> 00:29:19.119
but didn't care. And then Rich
and I were friends ever since. Thanks

458
00:29:19.119 --> 00:29:23.079
Mark. Yeah right, the story
Mark, Seriously, I didn't say Mark's

459
00:29:23.160 --> 00:29:27.279
less, but that's great. And
yeah, that was part of the game,

460
00:29:27.319 --> 00:29:32.319
you know, was was us doing
stuff together because we had we found

461
00:29:32.359 --> 00:29:36.640
out. The best part is Rich
that same day in school. The reason

462
00:29:36.680 --> 00:29:38.640
we were in the gym was because
it was raining, so no recess outside.

463
00:29:40.279 --> 00:29:44.039
And remember those days, Remember the
old brown paper bag style book covers

464
00:29:44.039 --> 00:29:47.640
that you had to put on your
books back then you might remember, yeah,

465
00:29:47.680 --> 00:29:51.119
actual paper bags. Yeah right,
well it was just brown paper on

466
00:29:51.160 --> 00:29:56.160
it. So Rich had been sitting
in class reading a book aggressively customized those

467
00:29:56.640 --> 00:29:59.200
paper covers. And this was one
of my friends who Mark, I had

468
00:29:59.240 --> 00:30:02.359
not been front but this again.
This was wall what led to us become

469
00:30:02.400 --> 00:30:04.759
a DM AND player, et cetera. Um, one of my friends Joey

470
00:30:04.759 --> 00:30:07.960
and one of my other friends Jason. Um, No, no offense,

471
00:30:08.440 --> 00:30:11.160
but uh it's the name. Well
let me let me let me hear the

472
00:30:11.200 --> 00:30:15.119
rest of the story of form offended. Okay. They decided, you know

473
00:30:15.240 --> 00:30:18.720
Rich again, new kid quiet,
doesn't know anybody. Um, And of

474
00:30:18.759 --> 00:30:21.720
course I had gotten in a fight
with the kid mark while we were in

475
00:30:21.759 --> 00:30:23.279
the gym, and when we're back
in there, so they they wrote on

476
00:30:23.400 --> 00:30:29.240
their brown paper bag textbook book covers
and walked around pretending to be nerdy.

477
00:30:29.279 --> 00:30:30.440
And what did they write on They
wrote what Rich was reading? And he

478
00:30:30.480 --> 00:30:33.480
was reading Dune, which I had
just finished reading about six months earlier.

479
00:30:33.559 --> 00:30:37.640
And now it's cool. Well sure, I'm like wait a minute, you

480
00:30:37.680 --> 00:30:41.720
know, like, what do you
guys like that? That's that's good,

481
00:30:41.799 --> 00:30:44.920
that's like. So we had all
of these things in common, you know,

482
00:30:44.920 --> 00:30:45.920
we like, do we start playing
DM D together? We did.

483
00:30:45.960 --> 00:30:48.799
So he was one of two I
had two best men when I got married,

484
00:30:48.839 --> 00:30:52.759
because Rich I knew from grammar school. My friend Dave I met in

485
00:30:52.759 --> 00:30:55.759
freshman year in high school. Again, still friends to this day, and

486
00:30:55.799 --> 00:30:56.559
I wasn't going to pick between the
two of them, so I took them

487
00:30:56.559 --> 00:31:00.240
both. So the best man in
a pretty pretty pretty good guy, pretty

488
00:31:00.240 --> 00:31:03.759
good guy and the almost excellent guy. So yeah, D and D stories

489
00:31:03.759 --> 00:31:07.319
I could give you a billion of
but that was the one that was not

490
00:31:07.359 --> 00:31:08.839
only the biggest challenge for us,
but one that, like I said,

491
00:31:08.839 --> 00:31:12.519
it started as a why are you
being a dick? Yeah too, well,

492
00:31:12.559 --> 00:31:15.920
you know what we could do with
this? Where can we go from

493
00:31:15.960 --> 00:31:18.640
here with that? And we turned
it into its own adventure. That was

494
00:31:18.680 --> 00:31:21.359
that that started as like just a
solid game story and then turn into a

495
00:31:21.359 --> 00:31:25.920
wholesome story. So yeah, I
think I think I'm satisfied with this um

496
00:31:25.960 --> 00:31:29.799
once again. Uh Tony owner of
the Keep in Brick, New Jersey,

497
00:31:30.279 --> 00:31:33.559
that that's my friendly local game store, So you should go check that out.

498
00:31:33.960 --> 00:31:36.880
It's it's the keypobby dot com,
which I don't think we said in

499
00:31:36.920 --> 00:31:38.240
the last episode we did, but
it's gonna be in the show notes anyway,

500
00:31:38.240 --> 00:31:41.559
so they'll find it. But the
keyhobby dot com check out their events

501
00:31:41.599 --> 00:31:45.640
schedule because you can find one shot
games run by me and a couple other

502
00:31:45.680 --> 00:31:49.079
dms as well. But but but
find mine and come come fill my table

503
00:31:49.160 --> 00:31:52.920
up. Um, if you would
just stop working for a living, you

504
00:31:52.920 --> 00:31:56.880
could do a whole lot more one
work. I work in an industry that

505
00:31:56.920 --> 00:32:00.480
eats up all my weekends. I'm
so sorry, but Tony, thanks for

506
00:32:00.519 --> 00:32:02.039
joining us again. Thanks you find
other stories. We'd love to have you

507
00:32:02.079 --> 00:32:07.319
back. And of course, Jim
Josie, thank you so much for always

508
00:32:07.359 --> 00:32:09.640
being a part of this. Oh
yeah, that's gonna wrap it up for

509
00:32:09.640 --> 00:32:16.640
today, all right. Thank you
adventurers. Thank you for listening to con

510
00:32:16.680 --> 00:32:22.319
Mudgeons and Jagons. Please share us
with your favorite adventures, leave a review

511
00:32:22.400 --> 00:32:25.400
on Apple, and follow us on
social media. All links can be found

512
00:32:25.440 --> 00:32:30.839
at con Mudgeons and Dragons dot com. Practice Safe Adventuring my Friends,